Jan. 12th, 2014

multipurposegoddess: (Default)
I guess I have been busy. I know I frequently think about things I would like to write about but don't quite come up with the down time to think them through much less actually write something to go here.

Anyway, as much navel-gazing as I have to catch y'all up on, today I am posting about my newly deceased uncle, Vsevolod, or, as I have always known him, Svetik. I guess he went by "Steve" out in the world, but I never heard him called that. He was born in Shanghai during the Japanese occupation and Babushka had a hard time getting enough nutrition, etc., while she was pregnant, which probably didn't do him any favors. And my grandfather had some peculiar ideas about child raising that led him to be too demanding of my dad and barely take an interest in Svetik, so the family dynamics were, to put it bluntly, pretty fucked up. He and my dad never got along, as kids or as adults, though the last time they spent together was mostly talking monster movies and was pretty pleasant.

He was a hard guy to be around - loud and ignorant - but essentially well-meaning and genial.

I can't say I'll miss him, particularly, he was never a big presence in my life, but, y'know, one less Skaredoff in the world, and there were never a lot of us.

The memorial service tomorrow night and the funeral proper on Tuesday will be Russian Orthodox, which will be weird for me. I'm not sure how to dress - I thought I had it nailed with my grey suit, but now I'm thinking maybe pants would be frowned upon. I'm sure I have something suitable.

Edited to add: spoke to my dad and he says pants would be okay at this parish, but I need something to cover my head. I have a knit hat that I hope will do, I can't find any scarves. I think I will go with skirts anyway, I can't find my suit pants (why I have the jacket handy and not the pants I do not know, but I have been doing a lot of moving-clothing-around and may have packed them into the wrong box or something). I'll have to wear my memorial service clothes to work, I'll need to go straight to my parents and then leave immediately from there, and i think I'll stay the night so I'll pack my funeral clothes. Sorry, Walter and cast, but you can manage one night, you've done it before.

Dad spent yesterday clearing out Svetik's apartment, which actually helped him feel better. Less guilty. One of the ladies from the church was helping him - she thinks of Svetik as a Fool of God (my dad's translation) and will miss him. I think that might be an apt description. And I'm glad someone will miss him.

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