This is me, not getting it

[multipurposegoddess]

So we had our regular relationship therapy session yesterday. I spent the whole time feeling like we were talking about nothing - we were, in fact, talking about hypothetical situations and I just don't really see the point of, for example, examining what DH's motivation might be for making a decision that he has not, in fact, made. We're just making stuff up at that point, as far as I care. But, whatever, he got some kind of insight from it, it seemed like. After half an hour or so, our therapist asked me what I thought and I said I didn't see why we were spending so much time on this issue, and she said a bunch of stuff about the addictive mind that I, yes, already know, and went on to misinterpret my spiritual practices. I corrected her on that, at least. And then when we were leaving, she said it was a good session, which leaves me bewildered, because it really seemed like a waste of time to me. I could have sat in the waiting room and crocheted while they talked and gotten as much out of it.

Comments

[fatoudust.livejournal.com]

Hmm. Can you talk with the therapist about it separately? What are you hoping to get out of it? Is there a way you can also drive toward those goals?

I know naught re: therapy, and I suppose there are times when it's going to be focused on him, just because of the nature of where you guys are, but I can see how it would be frustrating to you.

[tskaredoff.livejournal.com]

Yeah, part of the problem is that I don't really have goals. I went into it out of desperation and with the assumption that I would develop some kind of understanding of what this therapy stuff is all about, but it's been a year and I still don't know. She's had some concrete helpful suggestions, but I don't even know what kind of help I want or need at this point. Maybe I will bring that up next week.

[vwbug.livejournal.com]

That seems like a really good place to start.

My own therapy had kind of hit a "chat" point a few weeks ago, and we had to do a reboot--re-setting goals, etc. Maybe it's time for that.

[tskaredoff.livejournal.com]

Thank, vw, it's good to know that this sort of thing happens and is not just me being an incompetent patient or whatever.