Probably pointless worrying

[multipurposegoddess]

For the first time in my adult life, I am financially comfortable. H is making enough money so we have some disposable income without me working (and oh, how I love not working!), we have the recommended 6-months of expenses in savings, everything's cool.

So, yesterday at dinner, H lets slip that he doesn't think his department is going to survive the merger. A veep in anotehr dept has said she would take him on if his position is eliminated, but, really, who knows what Motorola will go for. If they decide to go all lean and start handing out severance packages, that'll be that.

This isn't even real worry, not up to my usual standard of I'd better find a nice sturdy cardboard box worry - we do have savings and I assume that severence caused by merger would be generous, and there would likely be unemployment and the whole thing may not happen at all. But I am really good at worrying. Give me an actual crisis and I'm all calm and zen and unruffled - make everything smooth and easy and I will worry like a champ. So it's realy a symptom of how good I have it, if I think about it.

There, got that out of my system.

Comments

[thezzyzx.livejournal.com]

With her two jobs, Mel makes about half of what I do, perhaps a bit more since some of her tips are cash and therefore aren't taxed.

[tskaredoff.livejournal.com]

Half is respectable. And cash is nice.

Last time I worked two jobs, I was about ready for a nervous breakdown from the stress. I did, in fact, pass out at the one job with what was probably a panic attack. So I don't want to take that road again if I can avoid it. More power to Mel for being able to handle that.

[thezzyzx.livejournal.com]

Her second job is only 12 hours a week so it's not that huge of a deal. I've worked 50 hour weeks plenty in my day.

I think a lot of it for her is that she's been through a divorce and many years with no money, so she doesn't trust that this will last forever. Independence is very important to her...

[tskaredoff.livejournal.com]

Oh, 12 hours, yeah, that's about perfect. Those were 70+ hour weeks that were killing me, but all of my part-time jobs have ended up expanding to close to full-time, somehow.

Hey, it's taken me 8 years to be able to think of Henry's salary as our money. And, honestly, knowing that most of the money we have saved is my inheritance makes the dependence more inter and easier to take.

I made us live in a 400 sq ft apt a block from the projects so that I could know I could pay the rent by myself if I had to when we were first living together. Because I have very large fear of needing to find a sturdy cardboard box that the cats will stay in.

[thezzyzx.livejournal.com]

Yeah and it's just delivering pizzas for a laid back company about 10 blocks from our house. She goes out three nights a week and usually comes home with $40 a night (at least now that a few other drivers have quit). Apparently, it's common for people to deliver za's as their second job so getting a sane schedule isn't an issue.

In reality, we could both live off of my salary as I lived off of mine before she moved in and she doesn't really add that much to expenses. However, I think she'd go stir crazy if she were just sitting around the house all day. Eventually, I want her to go down to one job... Between now and 2012, $1000 a month of debt is going to go away (my student loans in 2009, the Prius in 2011, her cc debt in 2012), so by then we should be able to get rid of her second job.

[tskaredoff.livejournal.com]

Getting rid of debt is a HUGE help.

I can never understand being bored without work - that's pretty much why my Mother-in-Law works, because she gets bored otherwise (and she likes having the extra money, that doesn't hurt, but she could get by without if she wanted to). I have so many other things I'd rather do than work, even if those things are sometimes just taking more naps and reading more books, I can't really grok wanting a job to keep busy.

[thezzyzx.livejournal.com]

I imagine I could keep myself busy for some time if I were suddenly unemployed. I handled a 3 month period of joblessness in 2000 pretty well except for the unemployment stress.

Still though, if you ask us if either one of us would prefer infinite time off but in exchange for not being able to go out and see music often or go out to eat much or do Jam Cruise, I think we'd both prefer to work.

[(Anonymous)]

Well aren't you all kinds of rational and reasonable. :)

And that's why I have always worked - because I needed the money for my non-working life. But at this point, the amount I could bring in would add less benefit to the household than the disadvantages my working would bring. I find it immensely frustrating when we both work the amount of "free time" that we have to devote to household chores and whatnot - with me not working I can do laundry and all that while H is at work, and our leisure time is actually for leisure. It's a highly individual calculus, and probably chaotic.

[tskaredoff.livejournal.com]

Ha! Posting anonymously in my own lj, that's a new one for me.

[thezzyzx.livejournal.com]

Well we have made switches. Mel was working 4 days at Jet City for a while and I argued her down to 3 because it was driving her crazy and she didn't even notice that's what it was.

The pro of having the Jet City job is that I get 3 nights a week to myself where I can watch the TV that she doesn't like. For someone who lived by himself all of his life, alone time is important. I wish she had some more time with the house to herself too, but I'm not taking on a second job for that. :)

[tskaredoff.livejournal.com]

Funny you should say that - I have become really attached to the time when the house is all mine (also used in part for watching the TV that H doesn't like, funnily enough). Part of my reasoning for taking a couple of classes in the evenings (as I'm about to do as soon as I get the schedule figured out) is to give H some time to himself to unwind at home - right now he only has the time after I've gone to bed early or something, and I think he could probably use some more regular Henry time.

[thezzyzx.livejournal.com]

Actually, come to think of it, Mel does get some time to herself coming up. I had forgotten about it since it's been so long, but softball season's starting up again and that gives her a night or two to herself if she's not working then.

Of course, usually all she does with this time to herself is nap anyway, so it's not that big of a deal to her I guess.

[tskaredoff.livejournal.com]

It can be nice to nap knowing you aren't missing out on time with your sweetie.

[thezzyzx.livejournal.com]

Mel just called me. I brought up this conversation and she said that she would probably want to work part time at least just so she wouldn't be too dependent. I knew it :)

[tskaredoff.livejournal.com]

That, I get. It all goes into the calculus.